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Can You Learn to Love Yourself Ladies?

Can you learn to love yourself, ladies? Being that this is the time that celebrates love and all its endless possibilities, I thought it would be an appropriate topic to discuss. As a man, I can’t answer the question of learning to love yourself for you but what I’d like to do is offer a few observations from a male point of view. Yes, I know I’m not a woman and some of the women reading might take offense, but I am a conscious observer.

Recently, I’ve noticed more women are motivated by fear than they are by love. Don’t agree?

Being motivated by fear

Think of how many times you think about the repercussions of not doing something than you are of doing them. Because, you think about what might happen if you didn’t do it, you’re motivated by fear. Its the same reason why you’re told to get insurance. You hate to think anything will happen but just in case it does, you have that insurance as a safety belt. The whole insurance thing is based on a fear of something happening in the future.

It’s the same way with your body. For instance, women are told to get a yearly breast exam not because they love their bodies and value health but because they’re taught the fear of breast cancer looms over them. Its under this same pretense many women struggle with losing weight. Think about it. The majority of women want to lose weight because they are afraid of what may happen if they don’t. Where there is fear love cannot exist.


Women are motivated more by fear then they are by love


Its not anyone’s fault women are more motivated by fear than by love but it’s true. Think of all the times you’ve been programmed to believe you had to be a certain age, size, and weight just to have value as a woman. These things aren’t fair but the fear of not being perfect sends most women into distress and depression. This is why there has been a dramatic increase in unnecessary weight loss and cosmetic surgeries over the years. Its also sent countless women to mental health clinics, drug addiction specialists, and into an overall dissatisfaction with their lives. Now, there are some rare instances when cosmetic and weight loss surgery are necessary and serve a higher purpose. But how many of these surgeries can be attributed to love and not fear based expectations?


There are some rare instances where cosmetic and weight loss surgeries may be necessary


We live in a fear based society, no doubt about it. If you want to do things out of love, let go of fear. That’s all you have to do. For example, its true for most women they need to exercise and eat right but they only do it because they fear what may happen if they don’t. What about loving yourself enough to be healthy?


Love of Self


Can you learn to love yourself? Yes, you sure can. When you love yourself you want to give “you” the very best. That means taking care of yourself on a physical, spiritual, and mental level. Too many women give up on loving themselves or find it hard to do because of failed relationships or something that happened in the past. They let the past define them and it becomes the predictor for the outcome of their life. One failure or even twenty failures doesn’t define you if you’ve learned something about yourself from them. I’ve learned many things about myself from failures but more importantly I’ve learned love and fear can’t exist in the same place. Its either has to be one or the other. Which one exists within you?

Love is simply letting go of the fear of what might happen, could happen, or may happen. Only when you move from fear and see everything through the eyes of love can you learn to love yourself.

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3 Responses to “Can You Learn to Love Yourself Ladies?”

  • Suzanne

    So simple but yet so true. Maybe it took a man to point out the obvious because women cannot see the forest for the trees. It is all about perspective. Is the glass half empty or half full? Thank you for your insight, it was incredibly helpful! :)

  • Yesterday, my girlfriend put up pictures around the kitchen of Victoria Secret models for “bodivation.” She looks fine the way she is, so maybe I should forward this article to her. “Learning to love yourself” is huge, because if you can’t ever be satisfied with how you look, you’ll end up pushing yourself way too far.

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